Ed Lomnicki: Overcoming Addiction to Strike a Chord in Service and Song

When my father, Ed Lomnicki, joins the conversation, he brings with him a lifetime of stories that unravel the complex threads of addiction and the beauty of redemption. His candid reflections on a youth marked by the allure of a stolen six-pack evolve into a tale of  substance abuse that promised false camaraderie, post-graduation lulls, and finding faith in God in order to turn his life around. Yet, it's the laughter we share, the dreams we chase, and the humble admission of our darkest days that truly knit this episode into a tapestry of human resilience.

Transitioning from the shadows to the light, Ed recounts the pivotal moments that reshaped his destiny—moments of legal reckoning that bloomed into spiritual awakenings. His transformation is not a solitary narrative, as we also explore the roles of fellowship programs, the embrace of his faith in God, and the laughter that heals. 

Ed recounts the 20 year venture of hosting Christian rock concerts and festivals in the Chicagoland Area, and how running a non-profit took its toll on not only him and his wife, but our entire family as well. 

We share not just the narrative of one man's road to sobriety and service, but an invitation to embrace your own narrative, to find wellness, and to live a life unburdened by the chains of yesterday. Join us, and perhaps you'll catch a glimpse of the freedom waiting on the other side of the struggles we all face.

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:06

Welcome back to another episode of Feel Free. The only podcast that'll tell you to chase your dreams and call you out on all your bullshit, myself included, got a very special episode today. I'm joined by my father, ed Lomnicki, here, to talk about sobriety, chasing your dreams and inspiration right A little bit of his backstory, too and overcoming the adversities that he had to deal with. So how are you doing today?

Speaker 2: 0:38

I'm doing great. I just want to start off with this, though I'm proud of you, man, dad appreciate it, it's beautiful. Uh, so proud of you. And we're bad, us lomnikis we're bad with emotions, um, but you've come a long way from the day I dropped you off at rosecrans and you told me you were going to breathe fire down my throat.

Speaker 1: 1:04

Right, right, right. Was it Rosecrans or it was Alexian Brothers? Well, I think it was.

Speaker 2: 1:10

I think they were in with them, but anyhow, yeah, you've come a long way, Appreciate that. Very proud of you.

Speaker 1: 1:16

Thanks. And well, this is one of the most serious conversations that we've ever had, to be honest, which is why I was a little hesitant. So my dad has been bugging me for a year now to come on the podcast, maybe only once a month, once a month. He's been bugging me once a month, sometimes twice, for a year. Been a little hesitant, though, because some of the topics we talk about here are pretty deep conversation wise, but you know, we're here now I got a space that can have the in-person podcast. I wanted to have you in my best studio. It is awesome, love it, thank you.

Speaker 2: 1:52

Beautiful job.

Speaker 1: 1:55

So what did you want to talk about today? I know I had a few questions about your upbringing. What led you to start using, using? We've had conversations about addiction and overcoming those emotional and habitual circumstances. So my first question to you would be when did you start using?

Speaker 2: 2:15

All right, so I can remember in seventh grade well, I was going to start using in seventh grade Me and a friend of mine were out at a bowling alley not far from the house, and it was a snowy day, and somebody left a six-pack of special export on the side of the building, probably to get cold, and so I said oh boy, look at this. We grabbed it, ran home in the snow, went into the backyard and hid it in a nice little spot in the backyard. One thing we forgot to do, though, was cover our tracks, Because I told you know, my friend, come on, you know, it was a Friday night. I'm like, come back tomorrow night and you can have three beers, and I can have three beers, and we're going to see what this is all about, you know. So we walk back there on Saturday night and there's no beer. But there's a note there from my brother, Wally Eddie, if I ever catch you drinking again, I'll beat your ass.

Speaker 2: 3:23

Okay, big brother, you're only two years older than me. Now I'm going to rat you out for stealing my beer, but so, anyhow, my friend that I was with had an older brother who smoked pot, so I don't know. A couple months later he gave his brother a joint and you know we smoked the joint together. He gave his brother a joint and you know we smoked the joint together. And I was just thinking about how, you know, the older brothers, the older cousins are always the ones that kind of get the younger ones started, you know. So I think there should be like a bill of like reparations, you know, Like if you start using and you have all these problems in life and you get you have to go to counseling, Well then that person who started you should have to pay for your counseling bills. You think I'm just kidding.

Speaker 2: 4:15

Everybody makes their own decisions and you know I made my decision to start, but you know, it is always seems like the older brother, cousin or somebody who who starts the ball rolling, and so that's what happened.

Speaker 2: 4:29

So I didn't. I smoked a little, you know, seventh and eighth grade and then high school though I love baseball, so I was a baseball player, so didn't didn't really use that much going through high school, kept myself pretty busy with sports and working out and stuff like that. But then when I got out of high school and you know I didn't, I only took a couple college courses for business, but I didn't. I started to, you know, focus on my business and get bored and then I just started smoking, you know, two, three times a week, and mainly, you know, I'm a marketing guy. So I always thought to my, I always thought I have to get high to come up with a new idea, a new promotion, a new ad. And and then you know I was. I was insecure, insecure and I just wanted more friends and those were my friends who were doing it, so I would do it with them and that's basically was my life for, I don't know, four or five or six years.

Speaker 1: 5:35

Was it just the pot? You were obviously like drinking at the time too.

Speaker 2: 5:40

Yes, I, you know, I was never a huge drinker. Surprisingly, Both of my grandparents died of cirrhosis of the liver. I think it was just because I have. I wasn't. I didn't know that you were supposed to mix it with stuff, so I would drink it straight up and I was like, oh, this is bad, you know, but I got to drink it because I got to get drunk, you know, but I was. I was never a big, big drinker, you know.

Speaker 1: 6:15

Was there anything else other than?

Speaker 2: 6:18

Well, as I progressed, I got a little. I got them into some and we'll get into that. I think when you, when we talk about how I turn the things around but yeah, if someone offered me coke, I would say, absolutely, let's do it, right.

Speaker 1: 6:35

So that was so. After high school, you started dabbling with with weed. You started dabbling with weed, you were business orientated, and then you obviously started to snowball into a lot harder substances other than marijuana. But did your upbringing with my grandparents, did it have anything to do with your boredom, or were you ever you had stated you were using in order to get friends right or to feel accepted by people you know? So did your family life growing up have anything to do with your using?

Speaker 2: 7:13

It could have and you know that generation of of parents. You know they weren't lovey dovey. You know I, I, I knew my dad loved me but he would never hug me. He would never. I knew my dad loved me but he would never hug me, he would never. You know, say how much you know never, really never, definitely affected me, growing up in my insecurity. And and plus you know I'm a firstborn too, I want to be the center of attention, so I want to have friends, and drugs were a way to get those friends and keep them and have fun with them.

Speaker 1: 7:59

Right, and so when did you realize that you had a problem Right and so when did you realize?

Speaker 2: 8:04

that you had a problem. Well, my eye-opening experience was I was downtown at a club. I had a couple friends, jordanians, and we went into the club and one of my friends handed me a vial with some Coke in it. There was only a little left, so I went up into the bathroom they had an upstairs to this club and I did it and a bouncer outside the bathroom heard me snorting or whatever I was doing in there. So he grabs me when I come out and he said get out of here, I know what you're doing. So I walked down the stairs and I go to my friends hey, you know we got to go, you know, let's go. So I walk outside and the bouncer follows me and he grabs me by the back and throws me in front of a female cop and says here's the guy. So she pulls out you know the uh, the vial from my pants pocket, pulls out a joint I had a joint in this pocket and she goes man, are you stupid? And I'm like yeah, I guess. So I didn't know.

Speaker 2: 9:12

Coke was a felony offense, so get thrown in the paddy wagon. California 26, which isn't your, you know, most easy jail to be in for a night. So I'm in there with 30, 35 other guys you know, nobody was going to mess with me because everybody had to go before the judge the next day but I just that was my eye opener Like wow, what am I doing here with these guys? And you know, they probably come from broken homes and bad opportunities and you know, maybe one parent home, one parent family. Here I am. I got two great parents, a business. My dad's handed to me everything anything anyone could think of to have a good life, and I need this in my life to make me happy. I need drugs. I believe there's a hole in everybody's heart and you try to fill it, and I was trying to fill it with all that stuff, and so that's kind of where I made my foxhole prayer.

Speaker 2: 10:16

I said God because I was born and raised a Catholic, so I still had that feeling that there was a God. If you get me out of this, I'll start reading the Bible, even though I don't understand it. I'll go to church, even though it's boring. You know, if you get me out of this, you know I'll do it. So next day I appear before the judge and he goes. Mr Larmakey, do you consider your idea of a good time powdering your nose in the bathroom of the Eddie Rockets. I'm like no, I don't your Honor. He's like well then, get out of here. I never want to see you again. What?

Speaker 1: 10:54

Kind of lucky yeah totally.

Speaker 2: 10:57

So. That's kind of you know where my journey to sobriety started. You know I did start, you know, going to church. I started reading the Bible and I, you know, realized that, yeah, the stuff I was doing, and I always thought, you know, I was going to heaven because I was a Catholic, I'm like, I'm not going there. There's too many, too many strikes against me, you know. So eventually I got led down to a church in Chicago where there was a guy talking that claimed to be a high priest in a satanic cult and his life was turned around by the Lord and at that point I said well, man, if you could save this guy, you could save me, you know. So that's really where my journey began.

Speaker 2: 11:47

And you know, I wrote down a couple of verses. You know, I have to give you a few on this podcast For sure. Therefore, if anyone's in Christ, he's a new creation. The old has gone, the new has come. It was a miracle, you know, and anyone who comes to faith, I believe it's a miracle.

Speaker 2: 12:02

But I'm not saying that after that moment, I still didn't use. I mean, I would still be hanging out with some of my friends and they'd say come on, just one. What's one joint going to do? You know, after I did it I was like man, this sucks, I don't like this. This isn't really who I am. You know so less and less, and you know more and more of other things. So this verse really struck me from Psalm 103. It's from David Praise the Lord, o my soul, for getting out all his benefits, who forgives all your sins, heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle. And it was just amazing how your mind is set to believe that you need these vices to make you happy. And once you make the decision to stop, it's unbelievable how many good things you realized you missed in life.

Speaker 1: 13:11

You know, by using Well, it's having a purpose and also having a faith in something bigger than yourself. Yeah, right, and they teach that a lot in Narcotics Anonymous and Alcoholics Anonymous, and even with my therapist and mentor, who helped me get sober, having an idea of who I am without the drugs. Right Was what helped me and kept me going, and to have something to believe in like that, like you said, you don't need those things in order to be who you are Right, right, so, and for you, it is a faith in God and a religion that brought you to a healthier place is a faith in God and a religion that brought you to a healthier place. You're able to start multiple businesses, have a family, a loving family, and chase multiple dreams also.

Speaker 1: 14:11

We do give you shit for not doing abs or legs at the gym, you know.

Speaker 2: 14:19

That's why I just want the upper part. Let's crop it right here.

Speaker 1: 14:25

Okay, well, I mean, you still have the determination to have a healthy body, healthy relationships with the people around you. So I do. I am a firm believer that everything does happen for a reason, and the pits that you were in at the moment helped you realize that. You know that wasn't the life you really wanted to live, which is tough to do, because sometimes we get signs from the universe, or signs from a God telling us of the things we need to change, and then we don't listen to them.

Speaker 2: 14:58

Absolutely.

Speaker 1: 14:58

Right, yep, and it's tough admitting that we were wrong Right, but you're only ever going to learn about life if you admit that you're wrong Right.

Speaker 2: 15:09

Mistakes. Yeah, we're all going to make them Right. You got to learn from them.

Speaker 1: 15:13

Having a, you know, a sense of forgiveness, not for the people that have wronged us for a while. I bet you were probably mad at your friends for leading you down a certain path. I mean, you had taken responsibility for your actions but at the same time you were like kind of frustrated at even putting yourself in that situation.

Speaker 2: 15:33

Yeah, I was. But yet I realized who I was at the time and the acceptance I was looking for from them. And then, when my life changed, it was like, wow, what happened to Ed Hug me doesn't want to have fun with us anymore, you know. But but you know, and then some of them were like, okay, this looks genuine. You know, let me talk to him about it. And those are the friends that you keep, and you know me talk to him about it. And and those are the friends that you keep and you know you love right that have stayed with you through it.

Speaker 1: 16:05

Yeah, you know, and there are people in your life that don't stick around after those times, but you wish them the best absolutely my mom.

Speaker 2: 16:13

Doors always open for them, and when they're going through their troubles and trials, you know Of course, I've got people in my life like that as well, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1: 16:23

So after turning your life around, you wanted to come here and talk about also inspiration or just dreams in general.

Speaker 2: 16:34

So I had some big dreams after I changed my life around. All my life I loved music, all kinds of music. I loved rock, I loved rap, alternative I could say. The only thing I wasn't crazy about was country, which is nuts, because now I like country, but all kinds of music, I loved it. And you know, when I got saved, my friend handed me a little cassette because it was 30 years ago of a Christian band I don't know, petra or Mylon something, and you know I'm listening to it. I'm like, wow, this is awesome, this is good for my mind and my heart and I like the beat. So you know, I just went just head over heels into all kinds of Christian music.

Speaker 2: 17:17

And then this friend of mine wanted to open up a coffee house and started having concerts and I'm like, oh, I'm in, where are we going to do it? Well, I want to find something in Elmhurst. I'm like perfect, ends up finding a place, way the heck out in Aurora, an old Masonic building. So you know, I'm driving out there and he basically put me in charge of finding the bands and booking them, which was pretty cool, because I had no vested money skin in the game. So I was like, yeah, let's bring these guys out, let's bring these guys out. Well, six months later you know it was the scene, was still young, a lot of people wouldn't come to these things and he just ended up losing money, had to close.

Speaker 2: 17:56

There was one group of kids, a youth group, that would come to a lot of our events and it would just be them, those 12 or 13 or 14 kids. So the leader of that group his name was Dan, and he said let's have one more show for the kids. We'll do it at my church in Elgin. And him and I were both metalhead headbangers. So we were like let's bring out Six Feet Deep, precious Death, mortal. Let's have a banger concert. And it should be done. That was. We called it Hardcore 94. It was October of 94. You, my friend, were about a year and a half old at the time, john, so I think we left you at home. Mom came and ran the door and so all these kids are walking up mohawks, tats, piercings, baggy clothes. I mean, judging a book by its cover, mary's like are are we? You know how mom is? Are we safe here? What could happen to us?

Speaker 2: 19:00

You know, so these kids are coming in and it was an old, old Baptist church. We pulled all the pews out of the main floor so the kids could stand and jump around. And it's cool because the group Mortal the guy in Mortal, jerome, is now the lead guitarist for Switchfoot, so his life has gone up. Awesome band Switchfoot. So anyhow end of the night, the kids are jumping up and down, arms raised, praising God, and Dan and I said we got to keep doing this. So that's where EDAN was born and that was my dream and that was my life to do these concerts. It got bigger and bigger and bigger. We ended up doing a festival at Alexian Field in Schaumburg. You were there, a lot of them Skillet, pod, mercy, me, casting Crowns every band you could think of we brought out to those festivals and had a blast. The Casting Crowns every band you could think of we brought out to those festivals and had a blast.

Speaker 2: 20:03

Things were going great until 2011 when we got a call from the owner of the Flyers that he was being evicted by the city of Schaumburg. He was a million dollars due on his back rent. So we're like, wow, what do we do now? He said, don't worry, I'm making a new stadium out in Zion and Kevin Costner is my partner, you know, and he's going to. We're going to build a stage in center field, we're going to have jumbotrons, everything we always dreamed of having at our fest. And then he said and I'm only going to charge you a dollar a ticket. I'm like, oh, this is beautiful. I'm going to do three nights. So we did three nights out in Zion 2011.

Speaker 2: 20:43

I had a great lineup. We did have Switchfoot, we had Skillet, we had Striper Reunion, newsboys, so it was a great lineup. 3,000 people show up the whole weekend. We lose $150,000. And I was so distraught and disappointed I told mom, I told your mom, I'm like, yeah, we're, we're done, we gotta, we gotta throw the towel in, you know. And she's like, oh, no, we're gonna be okay, we're gonna do shows in the fall and we're gonna, we're gonna pay all these people back, like, okay, I'll go with you. So we ended up, yeah, paying everybody back, but one band who wouldn't take a reduction in their honorarium. And now they didn't get anything Everybody else got paid.

Speaker 2: 21:27

So then the following year, schaumburg calls us the old stadium, their new team. The Boomers are like come on out, we want you to bring Ignite back. And they made a lot of money on concessions and parking so it was a cash cow for them. So we're like great, let's bring it back to where we think we'll have success. This is where we had it for eight, seven or eight years. People will come back. It's in the bullet of where all of our fan base is.

Speaker 2: 21:50

And we put together a fantastic lineup. We had Casting Crowns, mercy, me two of the biggest artists in the industry on the same night. I think we had to flip a coin to see who would go up first, because even though you're a Christian, you still have a big ego and they did so. The next night we had Toby Mac, jeremy, camp and Lecrae and all other great artists. Another 3,000 people showed up for the two days and lost our booties again over 100, maybe 150. So that was a tough pill to swallow.

Speaker 2: 22:28

We tried to reach out to the bands we still owe money to. We've been working with them for almost 15 or 20 years, some of them. Some of them we started in this area, so we helped birth them to what they became and we just said, hey, you know, let us bring you out. We have relationships with churches all over Chicago. You come out, we'll take zero money, give you all the money until we pay you back. They said no. Nashville said until you pay the bands off, you can't do concerts anymore. So that hurt, that hurt mom real bad, because mom was the one who ran these shows and hospitality, fed these bands like Kings and Queens and she was very disappointed, went into depression for I would say about six months. She just was shot.

Speaker 1: 23:13

You know it's tough because you guys were putting on these shows. I think it was tough for her because you guys were doing the concerts for man 15 years, 15, 20 years and then you guys became a nonprofit. You, after doing successful festivals and concerts, turned it into a really big operation Big, and I think it was a tough pill to swallow because it was a business still and you guys were promoting Christian music, christian values, and then to have that happen it would suck because you forgot that it was still a business though, oh yeah.

Speaker 2: 23:58

And that was the fine line we had to always try to straddle. You know, is is we're. You know we're doing something good for God, but yet we got to pay our bills and, um, you know, when our focus became more on the money and more on on that aspect, that's when things started to go down and our decision started to not be wise, and that's why he took it away. But it took me a while to get over it. I was sending, you know, spreadsheets out to a lot of the bands I owed money to. Hey, I'll make you 50% owner of the festival, you know, with the money you owe me. A couple of them were almost ready to do it, but it didn't work out, and so that chapter was closed in my life. And so where do you go from here? You know, this was a passion I had for 20 years and this is what I really almost wanted to do for the rest of my life, and it was taken away, but fortunately I still had a business a out the way they should, I believe.

Speaker 1: 25:21

I mean, if you had the opportunity to do it, obviously you would probably run concerts. You know it's a lot of work, though it is and it put a lot of stress on mom and our marriage.

Speaker 2: 25:32

Yep, we ran you guys around crazy during those times too.

Speaker 1: 25:36

Yeah, I mean you're trying to raise like four kids while you're essentially running two businesses. Yeah, it was. You know that's a lot to handle and you know all the sports that all the kids were in as well, you know.

Speaker 2: 25:50

That was our sanity.

Speaker 1: 25:52

Yeah, it was pretty hectic for probably a decade, I'd say for sure, oh yeah. But now the Tucks Place is doing well, that's for sure.

Speaker 2: 26:01

Excellent, it actually, covid, actually helped you guys out, helped us a lot, got rid of some bad competitors. There's not many of us left no, which is great.

Speaker 1: 26:12

So the concert thing and I think it's interesting because still some of my favorite music is still two bands that I am salty that you guys never got because they were a little too heavy yeah, we couldn't go into that heavy realm it was. It was uh our eardrums, which was, uh, the two bands that and Justin had got me on as well which were the Devil Wears Prada, who's still touring today and, as they Lay, dying as well.

Speaker 1: 26:46

So those are my two favorite, but unfortunately I wasn't able to see them live, which is all right. I still was able to see what POD and Skillet a few times, Five Iron Frenzy. So I'm very thankful for you bringing me to shows my whole life and, I don don't know, maybe bringing me there when I was one actually gave me the rhythm that I have today.

Speaker 2: 27:07

You know, I mean, joe doesn't have any rhythm, he really doesn't. He didn't get any of that, but it has helped me.

Speaker 1: 27:15

My connection to music has helped me with my connection to poetry, my connection to being artistic.

Speaker 2: 27:22

So I am always forever grateful for that upbringing in concerts, although if it was very stressful on the family you know it was, and there was one artist in particular that when you were going through some of your struggles that I think took you aside and gave you some advice john cooper, the coop from skillet good guy good guy.

Speaker 1: 27:42

So how old was I when you did that? Though you were in 14, 15, 16, maybe yeah, I mean I was in high school at the time yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2: 27:50

But you know, still struggling with your identity and you know, fitting in right.

Speaker 1: 27:56

Well, that's one thing I mean like, like you had said earlier, when you were doing these substances because you wanted to fit in, because you wanted to have friends. You know, even in high school, when I wasn't using too much, I started smoking cigarettes and I was drinking occasionally like a jock would. Essentially, I did not like smoking weed in high school because I was too paranoid about getting caught by you and mom.

Speaker 1: 28:24

Excellent, yeah, I mean at the time but you know, when I went off to college it was a different story, though A few hours away I can't say that I was trying to fit in in high school with the using. I did have a enigma that I lived by at college, though, for the Chicago John. Chicago, john by at college, though, for the the chicago john, chicago john persona. That, uh, you know I was trying to fit in, you know, and whenever you're trying to fit in at the expense of your own authenticity, it usually ends in destruction. Yes, and definitely.

Speaker 1: 28:58

It was a learning experience for me, for sure, coming up on, I think, five years sober you had to fall down a few times a few. Yeah, I mean a few. Yeah, just to say the least, face plants a few times yeah I'd face plant and then I'd dig a hole and hide in. It really is what I did. You know, I even fall to to this day still, but as long as my sobriety stays, you know that's.

Speaker 1: 29:22

It's not even a thought in my head anymore of whether I'm going to be sober or not, because it's totally changed my life. I know you're still able to occasionally have a beer, you know, or you like having a glass of wine, you know. Yeah, I'll never get to that point.

Speaker 2: 29:37

And see, that was never my. Where I got in trouble, it was with marijuana and pot. So I'll never smoke pot again, right, see? So that's kind of the thing is that I saw that destruction and how that affected my life and then, when you guys were starting to go through it, that's what drove me insane. It wasn't the drinking, because drinking never had a hold of me, which I you know is stupid because it can get a hold of you. But I was okay with you guys drinking. But when it came to smoking pot, I was like I hate this, absolutely, not Right, and we would have arguments about that and I didn't even I didn't even have the biggest problem with marijuana because, like I said, that one was easier for me to quit when I had quit everything.

Speaker 1: 30:23

The final time I had used marijuana for a month in order to get off of the cocaine and the alcohol, because the withdrawals from that were absolutely insane. You know, the withdrawals from weed is just like, okay, you're a little more irritable and bored, I would say, but it wasn't. You know, it was easier for me to get rid of the weed because it made me want to play video games and eat burritos and not work out. So that one was easy for me to get rid of. It was the like you had said you weren't too frustrated with us when we were drinking Right, and it's socially acceptable in society, true, to drink right. So what I had figured out is like okay, everybody was mad at me when I was smoking weed.

Speaker 1: 31:06

It was the hard drugs that had really caused my psychosis between the ages of 19 and 21. Like, the marijuana definitely had played a role, but it was more like a cherry on top of a concoction that I had brewed with a bunch of other chemicals, right. And then I realized I'm like okay, well, that chapter of my life is over, right, but people don't bat an eye if I have beer or if I drink and get drunk on the weekends or like, oh, he's fine, he's going to school and going to work, right, so it's, it's totally fine, society's fine with that. But that is actually what had me spiral the second time between the ages of 24 and 26. And I was fighting with this identity like, oh, society tells me it's okay, I can drink, and then deep down inside I'm like I can't do anything, you know.

Speaker 2: 31:55

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 31:55

So I had to yeah, I just had to give everything up at that point. And I know Joe struggled a lot with the booze too, definitely. Yeah, he struggled a lot with the weed too, but he nipped that in the butt when he was younger too, like in his early 20s, yeah. And then he probably did the same thing that I did and he goes oh well, people don't care if we drink, he would drink a lot, he would drink a fuck ton actually yeah you know you would drink a lot.

Speaker 1: 32:26

You would drink a fun time actually, yeah, but I mean what joe and I have done now that we've embraced our sobriety is just insane.

Speaker 2: 32:32

Yeah, awesome, yeah, he's training.

Speaker 1: 32:33

So what else did you want to talk about? We touched a little bit on your past. Um, I did want to ask another question from your upbringing, though. Like yeah, you had dealt with your father's anger and his diabetes. He was a smoker, smoked like a chimney Three packs a day for 20 years.

Speaker 2: 32:51

It's insane. And the funny thing about that is me and my brother, wally Techie, we hate smoking. I tried it once and I hated it because we would go on trips across the country. He'd be smoking chain smoking in the car and we're like, oh, this is terrible, this is terrible. So I told your mom when, when you guys were both in your smoking habits, I'm like, yeah, we blew it. We should have lit up cigarettes the whole way to Arizona, california, wherever we went. The kids would have hated it.

Speaker 1: 33:27

But I don't know and it's odd because it's the same thing with mom and her sisters as well, because of pa and non, none of them smoke yeah.

Speaker 2: 33:37

Yeah, so it's like the generation. It almost skips a generation because the kids hate it. Right, right, right right.

Speaker 1: 33:46

Yeah, I still have a soft spot for tobacco, but I'm going to be researching better ways to make it more how do I say ceremonial? You know the way they market cigarettes and shit like that and the chemicals they put into it. You know Tobacco has been around for thousands of years. It is addictive, though. I do think there's a proper way to have good habits. Sometimes, as you know, it's very easy to slam ice cream or cookies and shit like that. It's very hard for people like us, who are 0 to 100, in order to ease up on the throttle.

Speaker 2: 34:25

We're both that way.

Speaker 1: 34:26

Yeah, I've. I've gotten better at dealing with that with my video games and the ice cream and stuff, so I'm hoping that in the future I can do the same thing for the tobacco but Well, when you have your first kid, you're going to want to have a cigar, probably.

Speaker 2: 34:41

I think, I think, when, I when I.

Speaker 1: 34:43

I have another book I think that's another accomplishment, that is yeah, I also told lisa when, when we get a house too, like might do it then you know that is, that is a good time to do that right, uh, I wanted to ask about. I was going to ask, like, growing up, what were your dreams? Because you talked about your dreams when your life had changed. Right, what were the dreams growing up?

Speaker 2: 35:04

though well, they were sports oriented. I I, you know I love baseball. Um, seven years old, I was running home from school to catch the chicago cubs the last few innings, because their game started at one, I'd get off at three, I'd catch the last few innings. My favorite players Billy Williams, ernie Banks, ron Sano, don Kessinger and so I became a huge Cub fan.

Speaker 2: 35:30

And then, you know that was growing up. I mean, we didn't have video games and I grew up on a great block. All we did was play wiffle ball, you know, most of the day long, and other sports, and it was a great blocking community to grow up on. So every kid dreams of getting to the bigs. You know I had a decent run at york, um, but you know that that ended when I realized I couldn't throw the ball over, you know, 80 miles an hour. So but yeah, I mean baseball was, was part of part of my dreams and you know, and then it's just really just growing up in the family business, just realizing that one day, how how do we make this better than it is now? You know, so that was always a dream too, right.

Speaker 1: 36:22

Do you got any changes to your dreams now? Are your dreams just retiring and then fishing?

Speaker 2: 36:29

Well, you and Joe and Catherine are getting in the way of my dreams right now I can't say gee, because she's too young, but I would love to have a grandkid and take them fishing and throw and play, catch with them and you know all that good stuff. But no, yeah, I love fishing, going out there and just so peaceful out on some of these lakes and we're catching release, so we don't keep them, we just have fun catching them and that's a blast. Camping with your mother, you know, on our fifth wheel we have a blast just going out on the weekends and long trips down to Florida and wherever else. You know the Lord takes us, so that's an awesome dream to one day just be able to do that. As you know, I just got back from my very first mission trip.

Speaker 1: 37:19

Yeah, I was going to ask about that. So this is your first mission trip ever right, ever Eye-opening experience, I assume. Yeah, I was going to ask about that.

Speaker 2: 37:28

So this is your first mission trip ever right, Ever Eye-opening experience I assume You're going to do it again, that part of my dreams Nice, I'm going to do it again and take more people with me. And so I did have a verse from my mission trip that really stuck in my heart 1 Corinthians 1,. It says praise be to the God and Father of our Lord, jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all of our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. And this ties into you too. You've had people throughout your life your counselors, us friends who have been able you've been able to come to and seek comfort from through the troubles that you're going through, and totally proud of you for that.

Speaker 2: 38:25

So, going down to Honduras, in 1990, hurricane Mitch hit Honduras. The whole country was underwater, whole country, 15,000 people died. This organization, all God's Children, that I went down with, was one of the first organizations down there that set up orphanages. They had tons of kids, no parents, so they set up some orphanages. How long has it been? 30 years later, I go down there.

Speaker 2: 38:52

These orphans that were helped from this ministry I went down with are now like key figures around the cities helping kids that are, you know, less fortunate, the least of these, and it was just great to see and just understand how humanity is okay, I mean when you let you know the love of God flow through you to help other people out.

Speaker 2: 39:22

It's awesome to see, and that I went down there thinking, okay, I'm going to bless these people with myself, you know, and my good humor, and I came back just totally blessed by them. I mean, from what they are doing down there and the little kids living in the worst conditions coming up to you and hugging you, and then their teachers, you know, in these little schools praying over us. That went down there. We don't need prayer Pray for these kids, you know. But it's just unbelievable how you know, the less you have, the more reliant you are on your faith and God have, the more reliant you are on your faith and God, and the more you have, it's like, ah, I'm doing good by myself, I don't really need anything, you know.

Speaker 1: 40:14

So it's like a perspective, though, because they're able to be and we were just talking about this on another episode how important gratitude is. To be grateful, you know, because once you start having more than you may need, then you start taking things for granted, right, and it was probably a change in perspective. Like you said, you thought you were going down there to bless them, yeah, and you experience, and instead blessed you, right. You know, these kids and these families have way less than you and they're praying for you.

Speaker 2: 40:40

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 40:40

Maybe praying for you, so you realize that you got a lot more to be thankful for than you think you know, which that's a great experience, honestly.

Speaker 2: 40:53

Yeah, one of my friends hit me back because I sent stories each day and he said, yeah, our first world problems, you know, are nothing compared to the third world and what they have to go through down there.

Speaker 1: 41:00

Right.

Speaker 2: 41:01

You made my coffee wrong. You cut me off in the street. You know, care is trivial shit Right it doesn't even matter.

Speaker 1: 41:09

Are you going to take mom with next time she says she won't go? No, she doesn't. She's not an out of country kind of gal.

Speaker 2: 41:17

She's not an out of country gal, but who knows, I could work in her heart too.

Speaker 1: 41:22

Right, I think there's other ways that she could do service work like that.

Speaker 2: 41:28

Yeah, there's all places where you can serve. The thing about down there is that your dollar goes way farther because $1 is 24 of their dollars. So when you give to these organizations, that money can go so far into helping these people. Plus, they don't have opportunities at all that we have here. I know there's some tough areas here in this country. There is a government that will help these people. Sometimes Down there you're on your own. It's all you against the world, pretty much.

Speaker 1: 42:03

I think spreading that love, compassion is how you can start affecting the world, right? Instead of we're always just kind of worried about ourselves over here in America, you know, and it's easy to turn on the television or our phone screens and just see everybody fighting each other, disagreeing with each other, new things to buy, buy, buy, all of this crap going on, and then we totally forget that we're supposed to be in it together, right? But we don't realize that. I mean, even aside from religion or even aside from politics, aside from everything, we're humans. It doesn't matter about skin color or anything like that. We're supposed to find a reason to love each other and we forget that. So I think the rise of technology I talk about it a lot on the podcast and how it is essentially dividing us. It makes us feel like we're more connected, but it divides us, right. I think being able to use it properly will allow us to love more, right, right, we just need to learn how to use it properly.

Speaker 2: 43:18

This is a good start right here, right Over here, on the Feel Free Podcast. Yeah, yeah, this is a good start right here, right Over here, on the Feel Free Podcast.

Speaker 1: 43:23

Yeah, yeah, I just had. I have my buddy Brandon come on regularly and he does service work. I think he helps out at a food pantry once a week.

Speaker 1: 43:32

Nice, yeah, I was going to look into some options around here as well. And it's funny that you mentioned the Honduras trip because originally I started going to NA because I thought there's probably somebody there that I can help. I'm coming up on five years sober. I want to help other addicts out like that and I get there and I've realized the last two months that they're actually helping me.

Speaker 2: 44:00

How about that change?

Speaker 1: 44:01

Yeah, I haven't worked the uh, the 12 step, like the way the book has done it. My mentors helped me in a in a different way. So, I not sure if I'm able to be a sponsor in the NA sense, so I'm, I'm really just going for for me, first because it's good for me as a recovering addict to listen to other addicts, definitely, and then, from what people have told me there, they really appreciate my perspective on it too.

Speaker 2: 44:30

so, yeah, service work is, is very wholesome you know, and I, like you said, it gets you out of yourself and into helping others and and and it just comes right back into you. It's like it bounces off you when you help someone else and blesses you.

Speaker 1: 44:49

It's just the way it works right, I mean over here in america very uh fast-paced consumer consumerism capitalistic. Gotta get yours, gotta have business money, money, money, things, money, things, things, things. Money, money money, you know, and that's when we lose sight of, you know, just being ourselves and doing good things, you know, right on. So it's a lot of the stuff we talk about here. On the old feel free podcast.

Speaker 2: 45:16

So yeah, I've been working out, as you know.

Speaker 1: 45:19

I was going to ask that too. Yep, I was going to ask that too.

Speaker 2: 45:23

Yep, I had my little weight set in the backyard and you built a nice enclosure for me so I wouldn't get wet doing it. Just had one bench free weights curl bar. So that was doing okay for a while, until it got super cold out in January. And so then we went on the cruise and I hit the club there like three times every other day and I'm like, wow, this, this really is cool, these machines and I could get my workout done better. I could, I could work out more body parts, and so when I got back I joined LA and I've been going pretty consistently for I don't know, about a month now.

Speaker 1: 46:05

Right, I mean, aside from the Honduras trip, you've pretty much been at the gym.

Speaker 2: 46:08

You've seen me there.

Speaker 1: 46:09

I know I have seen you there.

Speaker 2: 46:12

Joe said.

Speaker 1: 46:13

He said you came home one night and he goes yeah, I saw John at the gym. My own son won't even work out with me. I tell, and I was telling I think I was telling Chris that too and then I don't go to the gym, I don't. I don't work out with people though, especially like you do, a heavy chest day.

Speaker 2: 46:33

I do a heavy chest. Yeah, really heavy chest, heavy arms, cause that's all that really matters in life.

Speaker 1: 46:40

So, but you're consistent though, and you're even doing the elliptical, I am doing the elliptical on the other nights. Yeah, I am doing some cardio and the ab machine too. I'm doing.

Speaker 2: 46:51

I do cardio and abs the same day. Wow, yeah, that's one of my goals and dreams is to actually see my abs one day again, really like when I was 17 years old and I had abs, I think you can. They're in there. I mean, what about your buddy Steve? Look at him.

Speaker 1: 47:07

Yeah, he's, he's killing it, he's killing it. I mean, they don't. They don't eat like pasta or bread anymore, though.

Speaker 2: 47:14

Well, that's not fun way to live your life guys, but Joe's helped them too with some of his eating advice.

Speaker 1: 47:23

Right. Well, yeah, steve was asking Joe one time. He goes what do you eat? He's like meat. He goes yeah, joe's like yeah, I just eat like meat and fruit. Meat, fruit and honey.

Speaker 2: 47:34

And then Steve's like what the hell?

Speaker 1: 47:36

And then he started doing it and we see him at what is it? Labor Day weekend, he goes. I feel fucking great Nice yeah.

Speaker 2: 47:47

It's good. And those two guys, they run, and he runs a lot. Is he running again now? He does the Peloton too. He does the Peloton yeah.

Speaker 1: 47:56

So what I had mentioned on another podcast. I don't know if you know this, but I rolled my ankle yesterday. Pretty bad again.

Speaker 2: 48:05

Yep, I'll probably be out for three, four weeks so you need me to fill in for you on the basketball court, I mean sure, If you want to go up there you're at the same gym. I don't know if they're ready for my sky hook?

Speaker 1: 48:16

I don't think so. Yeah, lisa was telling me yesterday she goes because I was getting. I get down when I get injured and she goes. Every time you get injured you just stop completely, I do, I just I don't do anything. I don't do, I don't go to the gym, I get hurt and I get all depressed about it. So Today later I'm going to go home and I'm going to plan out my weeks accordingly, like my days, and I'm going to tailor a workout plan that is doable right now.

Speaker 2: 48:47

Well, I think it's really a good time to start working on your chest and arms.

Speaker 1: 48:50

Yeah, but the problem is it fucks up the shot buddy. Then I start throwing bricks Keep stretching, yeah, but if you don't, you have to work out and shoot in tandem, right? If I put on too much muscle, though, I start chucking bricks, buddy, yeah, but you're getting more rebounds. I get a lot of rebounds. That's how this happened. Yeah, yeah, I out-rebound the bigs at the gym, and you rolled it.

Speaker 2: 49:15

That's a bummer.

Speaker 1: 49:16

Yeah, yeah, god, it fucking hurt.

Speaker 2: 49:19

Got to tape it up.

Speaker 1: 49:20

Yeah, I got a brace on it. Now Lisa's telling me I got to ice it too. But staying consistent with that, but also adapting, like I won't be able to use the stationary bike as much as I have been, or I'll be able to do quad workouts because it helps my knee, doing the leg extension machine you know the one where you're sitting like this, and then there's a bar here.

Speaker 2: 49:40

Yeah, machine, you know the one where you're sitting, like this, and then there's a bar here?

Speaker 1: 49:43

Yeah, that you can never get on because they only have one. They got two. Well, one, I don't like the one. Ah, the weird yeah, there's a weird one Like lifts you up when you do it, yeah, yeah, I don't like that. Yeah, I don't like it. But doing that workout with low weight and then, instead of using both feet, so if your right knee is bad, then I always just put a low weight on and I'll use one knee to do that.

Speaker 2: 50:02

I've seen people doing that.

Speaker 1: 50:03

Yeah, and honestly it's helped with my knee pain immensely. But yeah, being able to change up and adapt, that's my next goal. So I don't fucking go scorched earth and play video games and eat ice cream because I'm sad I rolled my ankle.

Speaker 2: 50:18

Yeah, Don't go down that path.

Speaker 1: 50:20

Nah, so what other? You got pet peeves at the gym, is what you said.

Speaker 2: 50:25

So I've been working out since I was maybe 12 years old, up in my bedroom just with free weights, and so my whole thing is you know, if you're going to work out, have some form, you know, do it the right way, you know, or you're wasting your time, you know. So the other day I see a lady on the lat pull-down machine. She's standing up and she's just swinging it back and forth. I'm like what is that? What are you doing? Just go to the playground and swing on the swing or go down the slide. You're not working out on the machine like that. Then you've got guys that are on the same machine and they're laying down and they're just, you know, they're pulling themselves up while they pull the weight down. I'm like what are you doing? That's not how you do it. Man who taught you how to do?

Speaker 2: 51:11

that they just don't know, though they don't know. And then you know you got the guys who go in the aerobics room and I'm like come on, what are you doing in the aerobics room? Why are you all in the back row? You know you're not there to work out. You're there to you know. See the show. The instructors go. Okay, guys, all the guys, come on up to the front. See you later. I got to work out. They're in there for the wrong reasons.

Speaker 1: 51:41

I think we were just talking to Edgar about how the gym sometimes it's like a zoo in terms of, like the pheromones and humans and people, eye-goggling people, you know. So that's why I like just putting my headphones in, Like I'm here, Got to get in, get out, do my workout. You know I'm not here for any of the other bullshit. You know other things that suck is people that just take too damn long.

Speaker 2: 52:07

Oh my gosh. So I have like one machine I finish up with. It's um, you know the, the tricep machine, and you know, okay, let me. I hope nobody's on there. Oh, there's a guy on there on his phone sitting on the machine for like 10 or 15 minutes.

Speaker 1: 52:24

It's like what are you doing?

Speaker 2: 52:25

Go If you're done for the day, or go in the locker room. Don't sit on a machine for 10 or 15 minutes on your phone, right, that's that drives me nuts. What a jag, yeah, yeah. So then I was there, I don't know, a couple weeks ago, and I told you the story because you guys were like you do the same workout every time and you know you don't diversify. And so I'm on the bench with my curls. I do three sets of, you know, 42, 45-pound curls like this. I go straight up and I twist, so I'm doing them and there's this guy on the bench next to me. He's pretty jacked and he looks over. He's like hey, how long you been, you know how long you been working out for? And I just, you know, I just started up again, you know. But for a while he's like man, you got about the best form I've ever seen.

Speaker 1: 53:23

Yeah, I bet your ego really needed that.

Speaker 2: 53:26

I don't think I could. I tried to get out the door. My head was about this big.

Speaker 1: 53:33

It is good that you finally see the pros of going to the gym. You're able to work out more muscle groups for sure. Yeah feels good. It's a nice routine too, and you hold yourself accountable to um. You are able to work out different muscle groups. So we do give you shit about, you know, doing the same three or four workouts in the dog run right and then, but I'm hitting some groups, man, I'm hitting some groups, yeah, consistently right, I think.

Speaker 2: 54:00

I think that's all that really matters is the uh, consistent Right. And then, but I'm hitting some groups, man, I'm hitting some groups, yeah, consistently.

Speaker 1: 54:01

Right, I think that's. All that really matters is the consistency. So what else do you have to say for the listeners out there Anything about if somebody's struggling with thinking they need to change how to make those changes, they need to change how to make those changes. Or what would you do if you wanted to chase your dream but you knew that there were?

Speaker 2: 54:26

things getting in the way of that? Wow, that's a really good question. Well, it's real important to clear your mind, you know, and when you're, when you're putting substances, and and and and addictions are in the way of that, you can't think or see clearly. So you don't have any vision for the future and for your life. So, you know, if you're able to get sober and get rid of the things that are clouding up your mind, then that's, I think that's the first step and just being obviously being around people, like-minded people.

Speaker 2: 55:04

You know, we always told you, growing up, bad company corrupts good morals, you know, and if you, if you are hanging out with people, I mean that's why it's so important that, as Christians, we go to church every week, because you're around like-minded people that you know believe the same things you do and care about you. So being around people like, like minded, positive influences in your life is a great way to, you know, overcome anything and strive for your dreams. I love the. There's a verse that says as iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another, and if you can get around, you know people that can sharpen you. That's, that's awesome, right? That's what life's all about.

Speaker 1: 55:49

Nice and I do have to ask this other question because Edgar has been bugging me to start asking this question on the podcast. Okay, what do you do? That helps you feel free?

Speaker 2: 56:00

Okay, what do you do that helps you feel free? Oh, wow, what do I do that helps me feel free? Okay, Well, I try to start my. I try to start my morning in the word, which I believe gives me a clear mind and direction for my day, and I do pray. So. Solitude is so hard in this society. Your brain goes a million miles an hour about what you're going to do for the day. You know, but if you could just sit there for even five minutes and just meditate and ponder on life and God and love, it's a great way to start your day off.

Speaker 2: 56:36

You know, and keeping your body in shape and exercising and eating the right things. That's another awesome way to feel free. You know, just, you don't want to be a slave to anything, and that's what freedom is all about. Breaking the chains that's a good answer, yeah.

Speaker 1: 56:56

Well, I think we've had a pretty good conversation.

Speaker 2: 56:59

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 56:59

Right, it's been a lot of fun. Absolutely Appreciate you coming by Dad.

Speaker 2: 57:04

Thanks man, super proud of you. Thanks Dad.

Speaker 1: 57:06

Well, you heard it Meditate on that. Have a good rest of your day. Thanks for coming by. And you know the drill Stay up, feel free, you.